The evening when Ishan found out the value of his presence in Shubman's life was the last evening of him in Punjab , through his college friend Mayank Ishan booked his flight to Mumbai , it was not easy for him but he still manages to come out from the clutch of the Gill family , for his surprise the hospital accepted him when he came with the offer letter
" Mr Gill has sponsored your practice , first he told us not to but we got his call today " It's been three days since Ishan came to the hospital and finally his HOD called him to inform something he never expected
" Sir can I talk to him " Ishan requested as his phone was left in the mansion , the HOD dialed a number and gave it to Ishan who walked out of the office and waited for the line to get answered
" Mr Singh ..."
" no...uncle it's me Ishan ..." Ishan answered when he heard Lakhwinder's tired voice he wanted to ask many questions but before him Lakhwinder said something that made Ishan speechless
" Don't ever call me again , I will make sure you complete your dream so just stay away from my family and never ever came back "
" ... all these years was I just a puppet " Ishan's voice was wavering thinking that his presence is not needed to the family who he considered his for his whole life and tried to meld in them
" Shubman is getting married soon and I want no distraction in his life so I hope you will stay where you are otherwise it'll be not good for both of us "
The line was cut and Ishan just stood frozen the bitterness was too much for him , he stared at the phone screen and his fingers automatically typed a number he remembered , the line rings few time and Ishan just hope that the man he is calling will answered him like he always does and will tell him how much he missed him
" Hello ..."
Ishan's knees weakens when he heard a female voice and no it wasn't someone he remembered , Ishan tries to talk but his throat has a painful lump that made him choke on his tears as he tried to call
" Look if you are from media let me repeat again my fiances is still in the hos-"
Ishan cut the call before listening the whole sentence and tries to calm his uneven breathings , Mayank came running to him when he saw Ishan having panic attacks , he helped Ishan to calm down and takes the phone from his hands . It was all blurry to Ishan whose eyes were filled with tears , Mayank takes him to his hostel room and gave him some water but still Ishan was crying silently
" Ishan why the hell are you crying for someone who doesn't even deserves your worry let alone your tears man , please calm down " Mayank's words were not so true because here Ishan thinks Shubman has moved on from him so easily but there Shubman was laying on the hospital after his accident
"n..no i..i gave my everything to them and this is what they are doing to me " Ishan's tears were the blood of his soul which was brutally shattered by Shubman's actions and Lakhwinder's words
" No Ishan don't waste your tears on them , live for yourself and enjoy the life you have my friend please don't bully yourself " Ishan face palms himself when Mayank hugged him and they stayed like that until Ishan fall asleep while crying his eyes out
The next day Ishan stayed in daze between his practice hours and cries in the bathroom alone while covering his mouth so that no one could listen to his sobs , the pain from tearing apart from the man he loved from his childhood was killing him day and night sometimes Ishan would wake up early thinking Shubman is calling him and sometimes he would wait for Shubman to call him but there was no contacts from Shubman or Shahneel and the cycle of life doesn't stop
It took Ishan one month to smile and take control of his own life he slowly and burred the pain in his heart that was still broken but now Ishan was used to the pain that was in his heart and memories , the hospital treated him more kindly than the people from his past , here he was listened , respected and needed so DR Ishan Kishan gave his full to his patients and his duty
After three months Shubman was in the lines of newspaper with her fiance , they were coming out from hospital together hand in hand it was a romantic gesture and the headlines said that Shubman Gill survived a fatal accident and his fiance was taking care of him , Ishan's panic rose after knowing that Shubman was in coma for three months due to the accident that happed when he left the mansion
Ishan tried very hard to contact Shubman or Shahneel but there was no response luckily one evening after assisting a long surgery Ishan gets a call which made him hitched , he quickly picks up the call and sat on the sofa as his legs were shaking from the anxiety and happiness at the same time
" Hello .."
Ishan shuts his eyes as he heard the heavy voice that once brought him so much joy but today his tears were screaming for the pain that voice has caused him , Ishan opens his eyes and tries to response but a soft voice breaks him into million pieces
" Shubman baby come to bed please , I am cold "
Ishan cut the call like a coward he was and he screams in pain and cries at his pathetic state , the suffocation of not even able to forget what he has for Shubman was killing him he throws his phone at the wall breaking it into pieces but it wasn't enough for him calm down , the vase was next throw that pierced his feet making it bleed when Ishan walked towards his fridge taking out the alcohol bottles
It was morning when Mayank came into Ishan's room and took him to the hospital because Ishan was in no state of joining the hospital as a doctor , his senior doctor came to meet him because Ishan needed guidance
" Doctor Ishan " The senior doctor Kumar who was like a father figure to Ishan since he joined the hospital came into his room , Ishan looked at the doctor and sat straight on the hospital bed smiling softly
" Beta do you think your life is worth of waste , you are a brilliant doctor and have a very bright future ahead " Ishan's eyes filled with tears as he listens to Dr Kumar because he knows his senior was right
" i..i..can't forget him ..." Ishan said while crying and smiling with his lips , Dr Kumar sighs and pats on Ishan's head
" My dear this is something I can't decide for , if you don't want to forget him don't forget him just remember the happy moments with that person and the feeling that you have for them and move on taking them as a valuable lesson " Ishan looked at Dr Kumar and nodes calming down a little
" I must leave you alone to decide because only you can help yourself " Ishan looked at the window when the Dr Kumar left his ward , the sun was warm and the breeze was refreshing just like the time when he and Shubman used to run and play at the backyard of the mansion where he planted all his favorite flowers they must be dead now
Ishan stands on his feet and walked towards the window and remembered how Shubman hated bugs and mud but would always stand beside him when he planted flowers , how Shubman was allergic to peanuts but ate the peanut cookie Ishan had made for the first time for him and then Ishan never once touched peanuts because Shubman fall sick
" Ishan we will grown old together "
Ishan smiles and the reason for his smile was little Shubman's words when they saw a old couple walking on the road with their hands in hands , Ishan sighs letting go of his frustration and anger because the feeling of love he had for Shubman was bigger than his anger , so he choose to embrace the love and let go of his anger
" We will grow old Shubman .... just not together " This time tears didn't came out from his eyes intead he felt relief a relief that finally his heart was free from the pain of hate and anger he had for himself and Shubman , Ishan learn the feeling of loving someone from the man who was the reason he would never love someone else but this feeling is enough for him live his life peacefully
He may not have the man he loved the most in his arms but he has the love for that man in his heart and that may not be enough but it's soothing , Ishan accepted his fate with a smile he was thought at the orphanage , the smile that will make people choose him even if he is broken from inside
After that day Ishan never cried he became cheerful and positive for his patients who always smile when they him smile , he dedicated his life to his job and his patients the pain fades away just like Dr Kumar said once to him , in the journey of becoming a dutiful doctor Ishan made few friends and a little apartment where he has his small world and few memories of his past like those same plants he planted with Shubman
Ishan made sure to cherish Shubman memories where as far from Mumbai's air Shubman Gill has no memories of his past at all , he was a hallow shell who married a women his father told him he used to love , he didn't know why his migration would get worse if he tries to remember what relation he had with Ishani who always told him she loves him but all he feel is emptiness
" Mr Gill this can cause you your life " The doctors told him but he still went Brain Zaps to get his old memories back but the electric shocks just erased all his blurry images he saw , Ishani Gill gave him medicines that made him stable but didn't helped him to get his memories back
Shubman fights with himself everyday to regain his memories but it was all futile , the only time his frustration calms down when he walks into the backyard where the flowers that he waters everyday blooms infron't of his eyes and something tells him that these flowers hold more memories than his brain
" Did I lost something that was mine .. but they say I have everything "
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